The Adventures Of Tripp Fantastic chapter one : A Thursday In August

It was a Thursday like most when Tripp heard the news. He had had his morning walk on the beach, rapped in his best curtain. Tripp had taken to awesome and weird way's of hiding from society, while amongst the locals. He liked to call society "the locals". It made him feel, better than them and he did not like himself much when he called them "The good for nothing". The reasons he needed to hide was if they recognized him, there would be at least two people who would cotton on to him as "Tripp Fantastic bicycle dismantler extraordinaire" and ask him to go to work on there bicycle immediately. It was his job of cause, but he had better things to do.

This particular Thursday in August he returned home to find a lavender scented brown envelop sitting neatly against Fredd. "Fredd!! What the fuck man!! What is the meaning of this??" He thought rather loudly. Fredd just gave him the finger and when back to sleep. Poor Fredd was clearly recovering from another "Jager bender" and evidence of which was the all over the walls in the form of wasabi projectile vomit. Not very reluctantly Tripp ripped open the letter to read "Dearest Tripp Fantastic. It has come to our attention that the space/Time quantum flux processor has been dismantled and reassembled back to front by a one :Mr G van Rooyen. We would like to offer you a reward of £1 000 000. To both kill Mr van Rooyen and then dismantle and resemble the time/space quantum processor front to back. Yours kindly Bobbit Shaw head of the FBI."
"How odd" he thought, Freed normally urinates in his sleep but there was no sign of urine anywhere. Had the mysterious FBI agent removed Fredds' urine? And if so, how kind.
Tripp had spent the rest of the month thinking of ways to thanking the FBI for dispatching of Freeds' urine. It was not until late November that Tripp had remembered there was still the nasty business of that arsehole Garth and his assassination attempt at the behest of Bobbit Shaw FBI....head giver.
Three minutes into balancing the pros and cons of the disassemble and reassemble of the S.T.Q.P and putting an end the troublesome Grand Master G. It hit Tripp like a drunk possum hitting a wall after being thrown against the wall by Hugh Jackman. The Albino Reptile Alien Scum was be hind it all. The fake letter, the removal of Fredds' urine... Mabey even the groove-alishous G-man from Cape Town South Africa. A reassuring thought popped into his mind " At lest this Master van Rooyen was not an Australian like that wretch of a woman Nicole Kidman. Lets face it who was she kidding leave Tom Cruise for a heroine addicted Country sing. Aliens where way more plausible, given the fact that if Aliens where really really small and lived in sub atomic matter and where created at the same time as us. One year for us would be like ... 26 500 years for them. So they would be capable of incredible and awesome-tastic deseptacons.
Knowing the Aliens and Tripp did, they probably staged the whole thing to keep Tripp away from his Taylor Swift CD's just long enough to cause Tripp to fall back into hallucinations and a mediocre depression which was manageable but more importantly best avoided. There was only one course of action. Tripp immediately climbed into his batman costume...he had had it since he was 5. It was very tight and cause his three rather pretty testicals to bulge like a 44 year old man in a 5-7 year olds batman suit. It was off to the mall for Tripp. He need to acquire the new Taylor Swift Dvd. He looked himself in the mirror and thought "Just shake it off".